Wednesday, 2 July 2014


Hi, basically, I forgot to update for chapter 8.
So in annex classroom, we learned about:

 1)Relationship stages
 2)Relationship Theories
 3)The Dark side of Interpersonal Relationships

There are all together 6 steps in Interpersonal relationship

Normal relationships that we come across in everyday life

CONTACT - This stage starts with perceptual contact including seeing, hearing, touching and even smelling. Perceptual contact followed by interaction contact in which basic or personal information about persons are being exchanged.

INVOLVEMENT - At this stage a sense of mutuality, of being attached, develops. At this stages people tend to collect information about one another in the relationship and begin to reveal or disclose their personal details. In other words, partners tend to test on each other at beginning of this stages.

INTIMACY - There are two sub boundaries in this stages. 1) personal commitment- private commitment by the partners 
 2) social bonding-public commitment(revealed perhaps to family, friends and public).

DETERIORATION - The stage that sees the weakening of bonds and represents the downside of the relationship progression. It begins from interpersonal dissatisfaction and develops into interpersonal deterioration.

REPAIR - The ways of solving relational difficulties. There are six suggestions, which conveniently spell out the word REPAIR
                        R - Recognize the problem
                  E - Engage in productive conflict resolution
                  P - Pose possible solutions
                  A - Affirm each other
                  I - Integrate solutions
                  R - Risk giving

DISSOLUTION - Its happens at two stages 1) interpersonal separation and 2) social or public separation.

Thru this class, Sir requires us to make a sketches of all 6 stages but unfortunately our group is the only group doesn't have enough time to present </3



Attraction theory holds that people from relationships on the basis of attraction. A person is no doubt drawn or attracted to some people and not to others.This theory has four principles :-
  • Similarity - your mate would act and think very much like you.
  • Proximity - you will find the people who live so close to you as attractive.
  •  Reinforcement - you're attracted people who give rewards or reinforcement.
  •  Physical Attraction and personality - you will feel more attached to  attractive people physically less attractive people. 


Relationship rules theory helps us clarify several aspects of relationship. First, these rules help identify successful versus destructive relationship behavior. In addition these rules help pinpoint more specifically why relationships break up and how they may be repaired.


One approach to friendship argues that friendships are maintained by rules. When these rules are followed, the friendship is strong and mutually satisfying.The strategy for maintaining depends on one knowing the rules and having interpersonal skills according to their friendship


   There are 8 simple rules for romantic relationship, if you have one then you should :

     1)Acknowledge each other's identities and recognize that each other's life.
       2) Express similarities.
       3)Enhance the value and self-esteem.
       4)Be honest.
       5)Spend time together.
       6)Be faithful.
       7)Obtain rewards to the effort expended.
       8)Experience a "magic" in each other.


Family Rules concern three main interpersonal communication.
   a) What can you talk about?
    b) How can you talk about something?
    c) to whom can you talk?


  • Work hard
  • Be cooperative in teams.
  • Don't reveal company secrets.
  • Don't form romantic relationship with co-workers.
  • Avoid sexual harassment.


People in a relationship experience dynamic tensions between pairs of opposing motives and desires.
    Tension between closeness and openness
The desire to be in a closed relationship and the wish to be in a relationship that is open to different people.

   Tension between autonomy and connection
The desire to remain as an independent individual and the wish to connect intimately to another person.

   Tension between novelty and predictability
The desire for new experience and the wish to have a same and stable relationship.


I don't know why Leena was laughing at this point where Sir was explaining about this and he was excited on teaching this one part. Leena laughed so hard until the whole class look at her -.-'

Well this is actuallydescribes relationship in terms of the number of topics that people talk about and their degree of “personalises”.
1)Breadth - number of topics you and your partner talk about
2) Depth - degree to which you penetrate the inner personality of the other individual.

The ideas of social exchange, more towards forming professional relationships.


Jealousy is the feeling of danger in a relationship due to some rival. There are 3 components under jealousy.

  Cognitive jealousy-imagining the different scenarios in which the partner may be interested in another person.
  Emotional jealousy-the feelings the people have when seeing their partners laughing, talking intimately with a rival, or kissing.
  Behavioral jealousy-refers to what people actually do in response to the jealous feelings and emotions.


There are three types in relationship violence:
  • Physical abuse : hurting the partner physically.
  • Verbal or emotional abuse : humiliating a partner, isolating the partner from significant others.
  • Sexual abuse : referring to a partner with abusive sexual terms. 

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